Independent Surrogacy Vs. Hiring a Surrogacy Agency: A Guide for Intended Parents
Why you should think twice before going ‘independent’ for a surrogate?
Hello, parents hoping to have a child someday by using surrogacy!
Today we are going to discuss infertility, the want for a child and your need for a surrogate. We will answer questions we have received about why you use a surrogacy agency and why that is so important in your search for a surrogate mother.
There are many reasons why you would not “go independent” in your search for a surrogate, but we will take a deeper look. So, let’s start looking at the differences of going independent vs. hiring a surrogacy agency.
When you ‘go independent’:
Your search for a surrogate will all be on you
Believe us when we say, there would not be such a thing as a “surrogacy agency” if the work of finding a surrogate was easy. We agree that surrogacy, in general, is becoming more popular and known about. However, that does not detract from the burden that carrying a child is for another family.
For a woman to sacrifice her body and her time for another family is a time consuming and serious decision on her part.
When you independently search for a surrogate – you may not understand all of the parts that go into finding a surrogate. Many criteria will influence your choice of women for example here’s a few:
- She must be between the ages of 22-38
- She should have had a pregnancy already
- She should be clear of any criminal charges
- She should have had healthy pregnancy histories
Without you knowing the last 2 of these things (it is not public record), you may be shooting in the dark on a candidate. Searching for a candidate on your own that fulfills even these 4 surrogate qualifications can be daunting- let alone making sure the rest is in line.
The learning curve is big and there isn’t the backing of a surrogacy agency.
At Made in the USA Surrogacy, we don’t just recruit surrogates. After we recruit and qualify them, we monitor their progress and help them through their surrogacy journey. Chances are as a parent who wants a child- you have not gone through a surrogacy journey yet. You do not know the many ins and outs of the process. Do you know when or how much medication she should be taking? Are you confident that your IVF clinic will be monitoring her progress?
Most likely they will only have the ability to monitor her on a very impersonal basis. Her medication will have to be monitored by herself (as in how often she takes it and when she needs more). She will be responsible for making all of her prenatal appointments.
Before you transfer – you will also have to figure out your attorney. Do you know attorneys in the business? Hopefully, you do, since it is a specialized field of practice.
A surrogacy agency such as ours would take care of all of these needs and more.
Who will handle the money?
Whether you admit it or not, most surrogates want to get paid for their time and labor during the surrogacy process.
You can bet where there is an exchange of money, there can be trouble. Who has decided the amount she gets paid? How will it be paid? Who determines if she will get paid for a procedure that was not according to plan? Who protects her payments in case something goes wrong with your funds?
This is why you need a surrogacy agency. We have trusted partners in the business of escrow who make sure to adhere to contracts between you and the surrogate.
Who will determine what is agreed upon in a contract?
When you hire a surrogate mother, the main glue between the parties will be your contractual agreement between each other. Who will determine the terms of your contract? If you are not an expert in surrogacy law and you don’t know an expert, you may not be equipped to handle the curve balls of the surrogacy journey.
What will you do if your surrogate backs out or has an issue with the transfer?
We know of so many cases where surrogates are hired or go through the first steps of the process (5-6 months) and begin to get cold feet. They usually text our surrogacy agency and tell us they aren’t willing to go forward with the process.
What will you do if that happens to you and you didn’t hire a surrogacy agency? You will have to start your process all over again, and your time-clock will restart. You will go completely back to the drawing board.
You may not be sure of the motivations of your independent surrogate.
Other than a family member whom you trust, we strongly recommend never “going independent” for a surrogate mother due to this issue. You may not know why someone whom you do not know will be so willing to help you complete your family.
Without the proper “stops” in the system and process of qualifying that surrogacy agencies have in place- you may be left with a surrogate prospect whose main motivation will be money.
Don’t let anyone fool you – our guess would be that 90% of the people who post on Facebook that they are willing to become a surrogate for you independently is money motivated.
What are the problems with this? Countless: Trust, Health of the baby in utero, accountability, and if they are not motivated by compassion – the end result could be disastrous. Check out this example of a surrogacy gone wrong:
It should seem like common sense for parents, but Craigslist and the internet in general (including Facebook surrogacy groups) are not trusted methods for finding a surrogate. We understand you are desperate to have a baby- but put your trust in a reputable surrogacy agency!
When you hire a surrogacy agency in California or Made in the USA Surrogacy:
You hire our surrogate marketing network.
We spend multiple thousands of dollars a month recruiting surrogate candidates.
This ensures that if something goes wrong with your surrogate candidate, you will have others to choose from without the hassle of finding a new one.
- Do you want a different surrogate or don’t think she’s right for you after matching? We will restart the process looking for a surrogate.
- Do we need to find a different surrogate because of failed transfers?
We will restart the process looking for a surrogate.
- Do we need to find a different surrogate because of miscarriage?
We will restart the process looking for a surrogate.
When you hire our surrogacy agency, you hire our professional network.
Being a surrogate agency based in Northern California, we have a network of professionals that all parents will need in order to facilitate the process of surrogacy.
You will have to lean on these professionals for advice through the process.
When you hire our surrogacy agency, you hire our qualification process.
Our qualification process is rigorous.
It’s so rigorous that when many surrogate candidates find out how much we need to have them be a successful candidate- they give up or lose interest. Most of our qualified candidates go through months of collecting documents, answering questions and qualifying.
We make sure that their motivations are not just money – in order to finish our qualification process, there must be more driving them. For most of our candidates that make it through and are accepted as a surrogate mother – they choose to continue because of a deep long-held belief in the process and want to make a difference in the world.
You hire us until we are successful.
Many surrogacy journeys can take 2 years or more to complete.
When you hire us to find you a surrogate, your agency fee will pay for your entire journey. We will be with you until your family is complete!
If you have any questions about looking for a surrogate or you are simply tired of trying to find a surrogate by yourself in the middle of facilitating your daily life and IVF appointments – please don’t hesitate to call us at 916-226-4342, or fill in this inquiry.