After the Birth – A Guide To Complete Your Surrogacy Journey
Hello intended parents!
We hope this blog is a resource for you for all information involving hiring a surrogate, information about finding a surrogate, the process of surrogacy and the process of after the birth of your baby.
Now that you are going to be new parents, you will need the help of what to do with your new loved one- how will you feed them, what will you feed them, and when do you feed them?
There are many concerns that you may have as a new parent after using surrogacy to start your family. At Made in the USA Surrogacy, we hope that you will ask us for any advice you may need after the birth of your child or any other way you think we may be able to help you.
So your new loved one was just born. What do you do now with their feeding and schedule?
Here are a few helpful tips regarding feeding:
#1 – Develop a Preliminary and After-birth Plan For Your Surrogate Mother
Most surrogates have questions after the birth of the surrogate child such as, what do the parents want me to do with the child if they are not there?
In the case of our surrogate birth, the new intended parents were not able to attend the birth due to the child coming earlier than expected – in fact, an entire month earlier than expected. This meant the parents were left finding flights last minute out of China, and that can be a challenge for many people traveling internationally.
At the time of the birth, as surrogate parents we were left with all kinds of questions:
- What would you like to do about shots for the baby?
- Do you want to do skin-to-skin with the new baby?
- Do you want to breastfeed the child?
- What will be the name of the new child?
Not knowing the answers to all of these questions can be a hassle for your surrogate mother. You want to make sure as the parents that you have the answers for her and discuss them before-hand, preferably much before-hand.
Do you want her to provide breastmilk for the child? Do you want her to do skin-to-skin? What about the shots? Don’t leave these questions up to the surrogate. Not only will your surrogate most likely be exhausted from the birth, but she will be worried about these questions if you have not told her your expectations before the birth.
#2 – Pack an Overnight Bag
The worst thing you can do with the birth of a new child is not be prepared.
We encourage all parents to be as prepared as possible with their belongings, so they are able to come at the time of delivery. Parents should plan to stay at the hospital or very close by while the recovery efforts are being made and all decisions are being asked about the new child as well as handle discharge paperwork of their newborn.
Many hospitals may provide you with a room to stay in as the rightful parents of the child while the surrogate recovers in her room. You’ll want to make sure and give a call to the hospital she is delivering at before-hand so you know what to expect for arrangements.
#3 – Go Shopping Beforehand
It may seem like common sense, but if there are flights involved (to the surrogate’s delivery hospital or state), you will want to make sure that you do your baby shopping before the birth. This includes shopping for essentials such as a stroller, car seat (possibly multiple car seat bases if you have more than one car), bottles, blankets and sheets for their crib.
Remember, babies regularly spit up and their new digestive tract is just beginning to be in use outside of the womb- this will mean you not only need many diapers but wipes and towels.
You will inevitably be changing this new little one out of their clothes more than 3 times a day due to the mess this creates, so make sure you have a lot of clothes!
If you have to travel to the birth site or to a new state, make sure that you are prepared to spend money in the state you travel to or in the city where you are traveling to grab the basics. This is not something the surrogates handle, nor will she need the stress of handling these aspects.
#4 – Safety-Safety-Safety
It goes without saying that the new life your surrogate has birthed will be the most precious thing to you! Check out this article for more information on how to properly address safety in your house for the new baby. You will want to make sure your home is “kid-proof”, for all of the fun that comes along with their growing legs.
Make sure the small stuff is gone from the floors, sweep up, and make sure your home is tidy. Remember, toddlers put everything in their mouth. EVERYTHING. So anything small that is lying around will need to be picked up and examined for the threat of a small mouth and choking hazards of all kinds.
Newborns and toddlers will be using your floors a lot, whether that’s for tummy time or for just exploring.
You’ll want to make sure you have an area of your home that is for play-time and just hanging out with the baby. If you don’t have carpet – you may want to find a large roll-out carpet in order to have a soft surface for falls and rolling around.
It’s not always talked about either, but safety for your baby in the car is also paramount. Make sure that your car is equipped with child seat anchors, and install the base before going to the hospital.
You will be leaving with the baby – remember that. It may be amazing to think about that the baby you have always wanted will be leaving the hospital with you- so make sure your car is well prepared as well for all of the essentials (car seat, diaper bag etc).
If you haven’t gone to your local fire department, know that you can make an appointment with them and they will run through child safety for you with the car seat. Believe it or not – car seats are not always installed properly, and the biggest threat to newborns or toddlers can actually be not strapping them in tight enough.
Don’t make this mistake- as a rule of thumb, the seat belt straps should not be able to be physically pinched when it is strapped. If you can pinch the strap with your fingers after strapping them in, it’s not tight enough.
We hope this information has been informative for you! If you have questions or comments, please don’t hesitate to call us at 916-226-4342. If you have been looking for a surrogate agency in California or a surrogate agency that is local to you – we want you to know we are your resource for finding a surrogate and walking you through the surrogacy process until you have the baby you’ve always dreamed of! Please fill out this form if you are interested or looking for a surrogate.