Becoming a Surrogate Mother–Managing the Emotions Felt During & After a Pregnancy Through the Surrogacy Process
Becoming a surrogate in order to give a baby to another deserving family who otherwise cannot have children on their own is an extraordinary and beautiful experience.
Surrogate mothers are typically some of the most caring and genuinely empathetic people on the earth.
That being said, many prospective and first time surrogates wonder if they are ready to deal with any emotional changes during the surrogate pregnancy. Some worry that they will become too attached to the growing baby in their womb and fear that they might feel lost when it’s time to give the newly born baby to his/her intended parents.
Other surrogate candidates might be concerned that their lack of an emotional bond with their developing surrogate baby could cause future emotional distress for the child down the road. Discover how surrogates can manage their emotions both during the pregnancy and after delivering their precious cargo.
The Good News About How Surrogate Mothers Can Manage Emotions Effectively
Women who are contemplating becoming a surrogate should be relieved to realize that many surrogate mothers today are successfully managing their emotions regarding the pregnancy.
The vast majority claim that their surrogate journey has been a positive one with many surprising yet welcome benefits.
Surrogacy is fast becoming an effective and satisfying method for intended parents with infertility issues to finally have a child of their own. When surrogate mothers work with an established and reputable surrogate agency in California, they will have many benefits and needed support to successfully go through a healthy pregnancy to term.
These surrogates are better able to manage their emotions before, during and after the decision to become pregnant for another couple or single intended parent.
Trust the Process of Surrogacy of a Reliable Surrogate Agency
Potential surrogate mothers must successfully complete the thorough screening process that our reliable surrogate agency in the Sacramento area has in place.
Intended parents can be assured that an experienced team of surrogacy professionals will be with her each step of this wonderful journey from the initial planning stages all the way to birth and beyond.
Their goal is to provide you, the surrogate, with committed ongoing support, expert surrogate related services and the many valuable resources available through a legitimate surrogacy agency in California who know the ins and outs of becoming a surrogate, what it is like to manage your surrogate medications, and how to manage the relationship properly with your intended parents.
What exactly does the process of surrogacy mean & entail?
When a potential surrogate candidate contacts a trusted and highly qualified surrogacy agency in California, such as Made In the USA Surrogacy, the potential surrogate then begins an extensive process that will hopefully lead to being accepted by our agency as a surrogate mother.
This intensive process begins with an in-depth screening process to best determine if the candidate is truly suited to become a surrogate at that time. This important screening includes a detailed look into the potential candidate’s past and current medical history including the woman’s current reproductive health and past medical records involving her pregnancy and hospital stays.
Afterward, the agency then goes through a list of surrogacy qualifications used to indicate the candidate’s suitability for undergoing a surrogate birth. The potential surrogate must also pass background checks including a criminal history check, current financial status, living situation, and many other qualification categories.
If the potential surrogate passes all of the agency’s preliminary screening requirements, she will then progress to a professional psychiatric evaluation to assess the women’s mental and emotional status and whether she meets the required criteria to become a surrogate.
The legal phase begins that will eventually include the entering into and signing of a legally binding surrogacy agreement between the surrogate and the future baby’s intended parents.
What do top surrogate agencies look for when screening surrogates?
Part of this process involves ensuring that the candidate possesses the mental and emotional stability to handle the ups and downs of the normal fluctuations women who are pregnant typically feel.
Recent studies have shown that gestational surrogacy is different than undergoing a traditional surrogate process where the surrogate is linked to her growing baby through shared genetics. These traditional surrogate births were all that women had available before this new age of advanced genetic technologies that allow the fertilization of a woman’s own or donor egg with her partner’s, intended father’s or donor’s sperm in a lab setting.
Indicators that surrogates are likely to positively manage their emotions include:
- Healthy surrogate support throughout the surrogate experience
- Safe, healthy and emotionally stable surrogate living and financial situation
- No evidence of mental health or adverse emotional issues
- Positive outlook regarding being pregnant with a past history of at least one healthy pregnancy carried to term
- Not swayed just by the potential for surrogate compensation
- History of easy pregnancies
- Not on mental health medications
- Leads a healthy lifestyle
- Non-smoker & agrees to no alcohol or drug use unless prescribed by her doctor
Gestational Surrogacy Differs from Your Own Pregnancies
Unlike when a woman carries her own baby, carrying a gestational surrogate baby is different on an emotional level.
While surrogates may still feel the emotional changes that come with the hormonal fluctuations common when pregnant, most surrogates state that they are better able to manage these emotions because they do not bond with the child in the exact same way.
Gestational surrogacy is different in more ways than one from having your own child, but most of our surrogates state that they are more worried about the process (doctors appointments, facilitating daily activities as well as surrogacy responsibilities) than the idea that the baby will have to be cared for after birth.
Many mothers struggle with emotions because of the thoughts about how to parent their new child, what the new child may be like or what they may need. Surrogates are not connected to the child in this way, because they truly will be giving this gift of life back to its parents through a legal process- and this, in turn, helps surrogates be more understanding of their role in the process.
It should be noted as well, that because the gestational surrogates do not share genetic material, more and more women are able to separate the natural feelings they have for their own children from the little one growing in the womb. Instead- we want surrogate mothers to bond with the intended parents, creating lasting memories and friendships through this experience.
This doesn’t mean that a surrogate won’t feel any bond with the child growing within her womb, rather she just knows on an emotional level that the baby is not hers but belongs to the intended parents.
More studies today show that surrogates who meet the healthy qualifications for surrogate suitability do not appear to have long term emotional problems after the baby is transferred over to the excited and thrilled intended parents.
Surrogates who follow emotional management guidelines are more likely to have positive surrogate experiences.
These research studies on the emotional well-being of the surrogate after the birth and baby transfer also indicate that these surrogates are far more likely to follow doctor’s advice and have generally healthier pregnancies. Surrogates should follow some practical and important guidelines for better management of their emotions while pregnant and afterward.
The Importance of Strong Emotional, Family & Peer Support
Surrogates who have loving families who are supportive regarding her decision to become a surrogate are more likely to manage any undesirable emotions that may come up.
Surrogates should also have peer support from individuals who understand what they are going through.
Our surrogate agency provides and encourages surrogates to have support groups where first-time surrogates can get the benefits of those who have walked the path before. Just having someone who listens to your questions goes a long way in the outcome of each surrogate’s unique surrogate walk.
Advantages of Going Through Surrogacy in California
California is considered one of the best “surrogate friendly” states, and surrogates from this state get the added bonus of knowing that state law is on her side.
California allows and upholds this type of surrogacy agreement, and surrogates often feel relieved and less prone to concerns over emotional changes simply by realizing that the courts protect her interests and parental rights are established by the surrogacy agreement prior to the actual birth of the child, and before the transfer of the embryo.
Surrogacy in California gives both the surrogate and the intended parents peace-of-mind regarding any potential legal disputes from either party. The process of surrogacy in California is much simpler and less worrisome with the majority of surrogates happy with the advantages this legal support gives.
Other sometimes pleasantly surprising surrogate advantages include:
- Ongoing support by a network of surrogates & specialists
- Access to the best medical and mental health care & counseling
- Potential to make emotionally uplifting & lasting new friendships along the way
- The immense satisfaction of helping spread the joys of parenthood to others
- Great compensation for surrogate related services
- Support of compassionate surrogate experts & resources
- Access to agency assistance with all details involved
Learn more about becoming a surrogate and surrogacy qualifications by contacting Made In the USA Surrogacy!