Intended Parents 11 myths you need to know about hiring a surrogate
The must-read 11 Myths About Hiring a Surrogate in California and Throughout the United States
Hello Intended Parents, or parents who are infertile and wishing to have a child soon by the process of surrogacy. If you found this blog, it is because you are researching about finding a surrogate mother and you are also wishing to get to know more about the process of surrogacy.
As a local surrogacy agency located in Northern California, close to Sacramento in Roseville California, we know the process of surrogacy and we have a lot of great thoughts that can help you when it comes to researching surrogacy.
The first thing you may run into when researching the process of hiring a surrogate mother or finding a surrogate mother are the myths about the process of surrogacy.
There is a lot of information floating around on social media regarding surrogacy and surrogate mothers’ stories. We want to make sure that you are receiving the right information straight from the mouth of a surrogate agency in California that hires and screens excellent surrogate mother candidates every day!
11 Myths that you need to know as a parent(s) about hiring a surrogate mother:
- Myth #1: “My surrogate will have surrogate friendly health insurance”
- Myth #2: “The cost will not be as high as $100,000”
- Myth #3: “My surrogate mother will live near me or live in the same state as me”
- Myth #4: “I will be matched with a surrogate mother immediately”
- Myth #5 for Intended Parents: “I will receive back money if the surrogate process is not successful”
- Myth #6: “I should wait to find a surrogate mother if I have not created embryos yet”
- Myth #7: “I should wait to find a surrogate mother if I have not found a fertility clinic yet”
- Myth #8: “I should wait to find a surrogate mother if I have not tried the process of IVF myself yet”
- Myth #9: “My surrogate mother must be from California and be a resident of California”
- Myth #10: “All surrogate agencies in California are the same”
- Myth #11: “Surrogate mothers are plentiful”
Myth #1: “My surrogate will have surrogate friendly health insurance”
The overwhelming majority of worry with parents who are hoping to use a surrogate, or looking to hire a surrogate for some reason happens to be tied to the health insurance that their prospective surrogate may have. We hear from intended parents regularly, and by far one of the biggest myths they may have heard is that they should find a surrogate with “surrogate friendly health insurance.”
We would like to take this myth head-on in a few different ways with facts:
- a) 98% of surrogate mother candidates will not have a current surrogate friendly medical insurance policy
- b) most insurance companies either have or do not have “exclusions” for 3rd party reproduction and surrogacy services
Though surrogacy has been used as a method for reproduction for couples who are unable to have a child on their own for a while (at least 30 years), the method of having a child by surrogacy is still quite new to the insurance companies and has created a large problem for them to know how to handle or not handle the costs related to having a surrogate mother pregnancy.
This does not mean that we as a California surrogacy agency do not have access to help our surrogate mothers procure a medical insurance policy that will cover surrogacy. It merely means that as a practice- intended parents should expect that their surrogate mother will not have a surrogate friendly policy, because of the fact that many medical insurance policies either have exclusions for surrogacy or they do not name surrogacy as a covered pregnancy.
Though the myth and belief that your surrogate mother may have surrogate friendly insurance is largely untrue – Made in the USA Surrogacy wants to make sure that every parent who inquires to find a surrogate with our agency understands that we have experts in the field of medical insurance and we will make sure to find a policy for their surrogate mother that they will be able to have a healthy pregnancy that will be covered.
We don’t want intended parents to think that we do not have surrogate mothers whose policies may cover surrogacy- but we want parents to be prepared to pay the price of a medical insurance policy that alone can run the cost from $1,000/month to $30,000 overall. Even though surrogacy friendly insurance is “hard to come by” we want you to know that having the help of a competent surrogacy agency to help you with these details is absolutely paramount in your search for hiring a surrogate.
We have partners who deal specifically in the space of surrogate friendly insurance- and they will help us understand any surrogate mother’s current medical insurance policy and they will suggest any needed changes that may need to happen in order to ensure a surrogate friendly medical insurance policy.
Myth #2: “The cost will not be as high as $100,000”
Unfortunately for most parents who are unable to have a child, the truth about their infertility and inability to have a child is that it will cost them a hefty amount of money between IVF costs and possible need to hire a surrogate mother.
One of the worst things that hopeful intended parents can do, is believe the myth that surrogacy costs could not exceed $100,000, or grossly under budget for their journey of surrogacy by trying to save money or being misinformed. As a policy, Made in the USA Surrogacy prepares all intended parents for all costs associated with surrogacy by first explaining the expected figure they will spend will most likely meet or exceed the $100,000 figure. This figure can be met or exceeded with a lot of the costs that are associated be that surrogate mother pay/compensation, or miscellaneous medical costs associated with risks tied to surrogate mother pregnancies.
Many in social media have been encouraging couples who are wanting to have a baby by the process of surrogacy that they can save money with regards to finding a surrogate mother and go forward with cost saving measures in order to mitigate costs.
As a seasoned and boutique surrogacy agency located in northern California, we aim to tell the truth to all parents- the cost of surrogacy will come near or exceed $100,000 easily depending on which surrogate mother you are matched with.
At Made in the USA Surrogacy, we inform all parents to be prepared that the cost to hire a surrogate could be $100,000 and, in many cases, could exceed this as well. We want all parents to be prepared that these are normal costs and mainly will be going towards ensuring that their surrogate mother is compensated for many of the issues and pain that will be involved with the pregnancy.
Myth #3: “My surrogate mother will live near me or live in the same state as me”
The truth of this myth is that unfortunately picking and choosing which state that your surrogate mother will come from, either choosing a surrogate mother in California or a surrogate mother in northern California, can greatly decrease your overall chances of being matched with a surrogate mother. There are millions of healthy women in America alone, and many surrogate friendly states in America. We encourage local couples from Roseville, California, Southern California or those looking for a surrogate mother in California, or surrogate mother in Southern California to always be open to the idea that your surrogate mother could be located in another state that also is friendly toward surrogacy.
As a boutique surrogacy agency located in Sacramento and the local area, we know for a fact that a lot of the surrogate mother prospects who apply to our agency may or may not be listed or located in the area of northern California.
We have had a lot of success with intended parents who have met or been greatly under their proposed surrogacy budget by accepting a surrogate mother from another place other than a surrogate mother from California. There are many benefits to opening your mind to other states that are surrogate friendly, and you never know- there may be a surrogate that is right for you- but she is located in a different state than California!
The biggest myth of surrogacy we deal with as a surrogate agency in California is that surrogate mothers in California are the only surrogate mothers that really matter!! How is this possible? We are not quite sure how this myth has been able to grow between surrogacy agencies in California.
Beyond the shadow of a doubt, the intended parents who are open to other surrogate friendly states other than California, are often matched quicker than the parents who are only open to hiring a California surrogate.
Myth #4: “I will be matched with a surrogate mother immediately”
Unfortunately for many intended parents, the process of surrogacy can take a very long time. Between the screening process of your surrogate mother and the process of making embryos with the IVF Clinic in California and also how long it can take to ready your surrogate mother with medication- it can take a while to find a surrogate mother.
There may be many surrogate agencies in California or other surrogate agencies in other areas that promise you a time limit for finding a surrogate. In our time as a surrogate agency in California and Surrogate agency in Northern California, we have seen surrogate agencies promise intended parents a surrogate match only one month after signing up or after hiring their surrogate agency.
The truth is that the process of hiring a surrogate mother in California and hiring a surrogate mother in any surrogate friendly state can take months and even up to a year or 18 months to find the perfect surrogate mother match for your situation.
There are many situations that can lend to a surrogate mother match becoming longer than intended parents have hoped for. We only wish that every hopeful intended parent understands that finding a surrogate mother match can take a long time based on many factors related to the matching process.
Myth #5 for Intended Parents: “I will receive back money if the surrogate process is not successful”
When considering what surrogate agencies in California to hire in the search of your surrogate or on your journey to find a surrogate, you may have heard online on social media or other professionals in the surrogacy industry such as an attorney or fertility agency that most surrogate agencies in California or otherwise will refund part of the surrogate agency fee if part of your surrogacy process falls through.
This failure can be due to anything such as the surrogate mother deciding that she no longer wants to partake in the process of going through with the surrogate transfer, or the failure with a certain surrogate could have had multiple failed attempts with IVF but the embryo did not decide to “take” in her uterus.
Agencies help you through the process
There are many reasons why the surrogate process can be arduous, and full of disappointments. But that is why when you hire your surrogate agency to help you through the process of hiring a surrogate, your agency will account for many of these failures. If it means that they have to provide you a different surrogate mother to follow through the process with, or whether they need to continue looking for a different surrogate mother candidate for you- your surrogate agency will continue to be your advocate in this process to see you through to a successful birth and pregnancy.
The myth
The myth that surrogate agencies in California or other states will refund part or whole of the surrogate agency fee due to a failure or a surrogate mother not having a successful pregnancy is largely false. Most surrogate agencies when hired to find a surrogate mother are there until the very end.
The Truth
The truth is those surrogate agencies in California are spending copious amounts of money every month on finding the right surrogate candidates for parents to look at and be matched with. They are spending hours and hours of time on answering questions from potential surrogate mothers and intended parents going through the process of surrogacy.
They are all different
Every surrogacy agency is different in how they handle parent funds, but the large majority of agencies consider your hiring of their agency as a long-term commitment that could take even longer than a year to find the right surrogate mother candidate and even multiple tries with a single surrogate to get a successful pregnancy.
For an agency to then turn around after these unfortunate events and refund money would be a poor business decision on their part and not fair to the agency or the parents as they hired the surrogate agency in California or another surrogate friendly state to fully deliver them a successful pregnancy through the use of their surrogate candidates.
Moving to a new agency?
Most surrogate agencies will happily allow you to move on to a different agency if you wished as a parent- but it is understood that the cost to hire a surrogate agency is mostly non-refundable and intended to hire an agency for the long-term until the surrogate mother has had a successful pregnancy.
This process could last the better part of a year (and most of the time from beginning to end a year and a half to two years, even if the intended parents are matched quickly.)
Myth #6: “I should wait to find a surrogate mother if I have not created embryos yet”
The truth about this myth is that it is largely false.
Even though it may make sense for intended parents to wait until they have made embryos or wait until the egg donor or sperm donor goes through the process of making embryos, it does not take into account the intensely long and arduous process of finding a surrogate and screening a surrogate mother.
The process of finding a surrogate mother in California or finding a surrogate mother in a surrogate friendly state could take as long as a year or 18 months (in rare circumstances but it does happen) and therefore, there’s no time like the present to start looking for a surrogate mother now!
There’s no guarantee that the right surrogate mother for you is waiting for a family- she may have yet to apply, and you may need to wait for \her- in the meantime, sign up with your surrogate agency in California and make sure that you start the process of finding a surrogate as soon as you can hire them to start looking for a surrogate.
Myth #7: “I should wait to find a surrogate mother if I have not found a fertility clinic yet”
The unfortunate truth about finding a surrogate mother as discussed in the last paragraph, is that the process of finding surrogate mother could be a long process. Finding a fertility clinic in California is a very important process for you to start finding what fertility treatment is good for you and your situation. However, it’s always good to remember that many surrogate agencies have access and are in contact with many of the better fertility clinics in California.
At Made in the USA Surrogacy we are partners with a lot of premier fertility clinics in California, and fertility clinics in other states that have state of the art equipment and their numbers of successful pregnancies according to the ASRM are some of the best! Don’t hesitate to hire our agency and get the process started as soon as you are able- you never know when the right surrogate mother for you is right around the corner.
You don’t have to wait to find a fertility clinic to find a surrogate- if you know you want to hire a surrogate mother because of the many pregnancy complications you are having, please fill in this form and contact us immediately.
Myth #8: “I should wait to find a surrogate mother if I have not tried the process of IVF myself yet”
This myth may or may not have a differing opinion from your treating fertility clinic. At Made in the USA Surrogacy, we always respect the opinions of fertility doctors when it comes to whether a mother should try the process of IVF treatment for herself first or whether she should first try with a surrogate mother.
We call this a “myth” because the truth is that you do not have to wait to find a surrogate mother. If you believe that you are unable to have children on your own, perhaps you have had many failed attempts or you have been trying to have children for many years- we always encourage parents to listen to their hearts on the subject.
We want you to know that we have many surrogate mothers waiting to help you that have proven pregnancy histories and giving hearts ready to help.
For many parents, the answer to this myth may be rooted in their budget. If you have money for only one round of IVF, and you yourself have only had failed pregnancies, then you are more than welcome to contact our agency and find a surrogate that is willing to undergo the IVF treatment on your behalf. Undergoing IVF for only one round could cost as high as $10,000-15,000 depending on the treatments and medication.
We understand that mothers want to have their children on their own, but sometimes budgets can only accommodate one or two rounds of IVF before their entire budget for this is blown or severely depleted. It’s worthwhile to consider the process of hiring a surrogate instead of undergoing a round of IVF if the parent may think they have better chances of a successful pregnancy.
Myth #9: “My surrogate mother must be from California and be a resident of California”
Being a surrogate agency in California, we have heard this myth from intended parents all too often. If you take a look at our map below, there are many “surrogate friendly” states that will treat surrogacy the same as California.
Therefore, your surrogate mother does NOT have to live or reside in California only.
California state laws are very surrogate friendly and there are many that practice surrogacy law in California and there are many California surrogacy agencies- but this does not mean that your ideal match will be from a California surrogate. There are many other reasons for matching intended parents (or there should be!) than just location. Please see our other blog post on your surrogacy timeline for more information about this topic.
Myth #10: “All surrogate agencies in California are the same”
- You may have been researching the topic of finding a surrogate in California, a different state, or finding a surrogacy agency that’s right for you. All surrogate agencies in California are the same- this myth is false.
- All surrogate agencies operate as a business, and as such, have different marketing methods, different costs of doing business, and also different ways of doing business. In the same way, surrogate agencies have similar methods of screening surrogate candidates, but some may be more detailed in this process than others.
For example, did you know that Made in the USA Surrogacy asks all potential surrogate mothers to obtain a letter from their OBGYN stating that they are medically cleared for the process of surrogacy and they would be an excellent candidate for surrogacy?
Did you know that Made in the USA Surrogacy has all candidates’ medical records reviewed not only by the fertility clinic the parents are working with but by an independent midwife staff? Did you know that Made in the USA Surrogacy’s agency fee and other associated costs such as surrogate compensation are among some of the lowest among their competitor surrogate agencies in California?
Myth #11- “Surrogate mothers are plentiful”
Quite possibly the worst myth that we have heard as a surrogate agency in California is that surrogate mothers are plentiful. Almost every intended parent that contacts our agency has high hopes for being matched with a surrogate mother quickly and will have their pick of the litter. The truth to this myth is that unfortunately, there are not a lot of surrogate mothers that are available at any one time, and it is a long and arduous process for surrogate mothers to be accepted as a surrogate prospect.
Because of the high demand and also the many surrogate qualifications that surrogate mothers have to qualify with (these are only some of the beginning qualifications), surrogate mothers are not plentiful. We know this can be sobering news- but this is more of a reason for you to start the process of looking for a surrogate now, because you never know when the right one will come along for you specifically- and you want to be ready to accept them as YOUR surrogate!
Please contact us on this number to get started! 916-226-4342
